


There's nothing but love in the world

by M3H



Category: AKB48, HKT48
Genre: F/F, also english is not my first language PLEASE BE NICE, this is my first fic ever PLEASE BE NICE
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-28
Updated: 2016-12-28
Packaged: 2018-09-12 22:16:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9092884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/M3H/pseuds/M3H
Summary: Haruka and Sakura are at their first year of high school. They've been sharing same classes and same schools for nine years, since first grade. But since first grade they could never stand each other. Because her family will be having financial problems, Sakura will find a way to sustain them - going working as a hostess in a Hostess Club. There she will meet many interesting people (her co-workers, mostly, because customers are usually very BORING) but, very much unexpectedly, also her classmate, Haruka, who followed her one day after school.





	1. "You didn't lisp" - "I... didn't lisp".

Kodama Haruka and Miyawaki Sakura have been attending the same schools and sharing the same classrooms since first grade in primary school. You’d call them Best Friends Forever, if it weren’t that they couldn’t stand each other. 

Miyawaki Sakura was the only child of a middle class family. She managed to always get great grades at school with the minimum of efforts. She herself didn’t know how it happened, but it just took her half an hour on a book in order to fully understand what it talked about and be able to more than successfully take a test the following day. Her father was an employee of a business company and he was the only one financially providing for the family, since her mother didn’t go to work. But so long as they loved each other and could provide themselves everything they needed, life seemed going in the right way. Until the business company Sakura’s father worked for didn’t go bankrupt few months later the girl started her first year in high school, and the man lost his job. 

Sakura quickly decided to go working part time in order to provide for her family while her father looked for a new job. Every day, after school, she would take two different shifts as bartender in two different bars, one after another, and go back home at past 12am. The good news is that her house was five minutes away from school, so she didn’t have to wake up extremely _early_ in the morning.

But when her father – nor her mother, for what matters – couldn’t find a new job, she realized that the one who had to find a new one was _her._ A job that could provide an income that could actually sustain a three people family.  
She remembered that during one of her night shifts she met a guy who, despite had shown her his ID that said he was of the age to drink alcohol, he looked like someone who was _just_ her age (she didn’t care much about the false ID at the time, if he wanted to ruin his life it wasn’t her call to stop him – and she saw another bartender to serve alcohol to another girl who looked even younger than the guy in front of her, so she thought the rest of the staff didn’t care either). In  a desperate attempt of hitting on her, he left her his number, so she figured she might as well call him, hang out with him and make him tell her where he got the false ID in the first place. 

_And_ , he was already kind of drunk when they met, so it didn’t take her much time either, really. 

She went to meet this guy (in a very creepy ally, by the way, _past_ 12am. She was surprised he wasn’t there waiting for her with other four or five _fellows_ ),  who told her to know a guy who had a few friends who could make her a false ID. It almost cost her that month’s full income, but the guy had guaranteed that his friend’s friends worked fast.  
And he was right.  
When she got her ID, only three days later, she went to pay a visit to a certain Hostess Bar that was situated in the suburban area of Fukuoka (she had heard someone talking about it during her night shift at the bar as well. It was surprising – also, _disgusting_ , at times - coming to know how many stories and details people were willing to shared with each other so late at night). She found a young woman (who was probably only a few years older than her), and a man probably on his 50s, to greet her. They told her their names were Matsui Jurina and Saionji… Just Saionji. 

The good news is that they didn’t start any kind of interview. They didn’t ask for why she was attempting to get that job, why she needed it, where she had heard talking about it, what kind of job she did before, and most importantly, they actually _believed_ that she was 20 years old (she thought that, they either were very stupid or they just _didn’t care_ ). They also told her that her shift would start at 10pm and end around 4am (unless someone asked to go for an After), which was… Both good and bad news, actually, because she would have had time to study but basically _no time_ to sleep. 

Other bad news included the fact that she had to wear a flamboyant, overly sparkling, bulky, chest-exposing, white dress (which wasn’t really bad, if she had to be honest, she kind of liked the style of it… For a wedding?!), let middle aged men _stare_ at her chest (if they felt like it, of course), speak like a silly b**** (like one of those maids wearing cat-ears and being all childish, saying things such as, “Make it become sweet~!” even though they’re over 25 years old, with the only exception that she wasn’t going to wear cat-ears and that she was going to serve cocktails instead of milkshakes despite she was still underage), and she was going to have a Hostess alias(!), which was going to be: “Same-chan”.

She also got acquainted with another man, whose name was Satoshi. He was the head of the Black Suits (who were nothing but… waiters?) and he introduced her to the Hostess world. He taught her how to speak, how to move, what to say, what _not_ to say and such.  
The following day she was already expected to be on the work place.  
(Her parents only knew that she had got a new job as bartender somewhere else where they paid _way better_ than the last two places combined)

The work environment itself wasn’t bad, she had to admit it. Mood lighting, soft music, the whole place was quite inviting, actually, and her co-workers seemed overall nice people.  
Despite it was only her first day, though, basically every customer took a peek at her chest about a hundred times and one even grabbed her butt while she was standing up to go to the toilet.  
She was about to slap him in the face, but Jurina – actually, Kurage-chan, readily grabbed her for the arm and dragged her in the bathroom, crushing her back against the wall and scolding her for almost messing up with one of their customers.  
(She was… Surprisingly strong and kind of intimidating?).  
  
The rest of the night went on smoothly – sort of – and once she got back home and reached for her bed, she fell asleep in literally no time.  
The following day at school, the word “Zombie” won’t be enough accurate to describe Sakura’s state and looks. She will keep staggering and wobbling around the school hallways until she reaches for her desk in her own classroom and immediately passes out. Even her best and only friend, Murashige Anna, will have no idea what happened to her. Until tension will start rising between her and the Class President. 

The thing about Kodama Haruka is: she wanted to be someone.  
She wanted to be successful, she wanted to leave something behind, she wanted to be of an impact on people, inspire them, be someone they could look up to; she wanted to be everything her father had never been to her.  
But in order to do that, she thought she had to be perfect. She thought she had to have the best grades at school, always, from primary school to university, and eventually graduate with best scores. She thought about doing something important, then, like opening her own company, or becoming the head of an important production industry, leading people to do something good for the country. And maybe even for the world. She was willing to work hard. She was willing to prove to the world how much worth she was. Despite her family was rich – her father’s family had been having _plenty_ of money for generations over generations. But her father had never made a good use out of it; he himself owned a small company, but he wasn’t half as invested in it as he was in alcohol and gambling.  
(She truly hated him _so much_. He was the person she wanted to avoid to become at all costs).

Thus, her days usually involved; waking up at six, making breakfast for her mother  - she woke up about a hour later for _actual_ work, whereas her father usually slept until 10am -, exercise her talking skills while getting ready for school (she had a, so called, “lisp” or “speech impediment”, which made other people usually laugh at her, especially at school), check her bag from three to ten times in order to be sure not to be forgetting anything (despite she craved to be perfect, her absent-mindedness would often times trick her and make her forget the most important things, such as homework, school books and house-keys) and head for school (despite it took her two times longer with the bus, she insisted because her father didn’t hire any personal driver. She didn’t need to be seen as élite by people because she had money; she wanted to be seen as élite by people because she was more intelligent and hardworking than the average). 

She was elected as Class President by her classmates, but she knew that it was only because the other candidate was _Sakura._  
Fate would have it, they had been knowing each other since first grade. Same schools, same classrooms, always, for nine years. The reason why Haruka hated her, was because she couldn’t stand the thought of Sakura being always the best student - just like her -, without making any efforts. She hated how she didn’t have to spend hours and hours on books, or exercising her talking skills for the matter. She hated how she always appeared to feel superior to everyone else – to _her_. She hated how, back in first grade, both her parents always went to pick her up at school, together, and what a lovely family they always seemed to be (Haruka’s mother was a nurse, and sometimes, just five minutes before the woman was about to finish her shift at work, a new, seriously injured patient would be brought in, preventing the woman to leave sometimes for other two hours, leaving her daughter waiting for her at school – As for Haruka’s father, he had been always too busy being everything but a father for her). She hated how uncomfortable Sakura made her feel whenever their eyes met or whenever they ended up standing close to each other - one time they had to sit next to each other for a school project (it was in 8 th grade, Social Studies class, they were sitting right beside the window. It was a hot day, probably middle May, Sakura was wearing gym clothes because the usual school uniform she wore got stained while she was eating a Melon Pan filled with chocolate.) (It had been a long time since Haruka last saw the other girl eating a melon pan and sometimes, as she passed by melon pan stores, she wondered if she still liked them…) (Her hair was still long, too, whereas since high school started she had been wearing a shorter hairstyle which gave her a more mature look – which Haruka thought totally suited her, by the way), and despite they were supposed only to study, Haruka couldn’t stop feeling uneasy and uncomfortable, for some reason. She felt weird at the stomach, her heart beating faster than usual, her cheeks felt hot – but then again, that probably was because of the hot weather – she even thought those might be the signs of a panic attack, or something… The point is! She had to finish that project at home, alone, by herself, because she had to excuse herself and go to the infirmary, and when she came back to her class the Social Studies hour was already over!  
She just couldn’t stand her. At all.  
  
Therefore, when Sakura set foot in their classroom, that day, looking as a zombie and falling asleep on her desk, immediately, _as it was no big deal,_ Haruka swallowed hard and told herself she had to scold her and make her  properly respect the rules even though the mere thought of it was starting to make her feel uncomfortable (because they rarely ever talked, really. It had always been like that since first grade. They barely ever acknowledged each other’s presence). 

As the first couple of hours passed by – Japanese literature was hard to follow even for her –Haruka stood up from her seat and approached Sakura’s desk (they were literally sitting on opposite sides of the room), making her presence known to the supposed-to-be-still-sleeping-girl with a cough.  
But Sakura had already been abruptly woken up by Haruka’s chair, which irritatingly scraped on the floor. 

The half asleep girl sighed, “What do you want?” she began, without even lifting the head from her desk.   
“You know you’re not allowed to sleep during classes, Sakura,” Haruka uttered, trying to keep a steady look – her arms crossed, her back stiff.   
“We’re on first name basis, today?”   
Haruka blinked to the question; she didn’t even notice the way she had called her.   
She cleared her throat one more time, before speaking again, “ As Class President, it is my duty to make sure that my classmates exhibit a proper way of being in class and that they pay attention to lessons. If you don’t feel well, you can still go to the infirmary, Miyawaki- _san_ ,” she kind of accentuated that last word.   
Sakura slowly lifted her head from the desk, looking up in Haruka’s direction, but failing to meet her eyes as the other girl readily glanced away.  
“You didn’t lisp,” Sakura pointed out, almost hinting a smile.   
Haruka furrowed for a moment, confused by the girl’s statement, and _finally_ turned to lock eyes with her, “I… didn’t lisp,”. 

They looked at each other for a few moments before Murashige made one of her usual very loud entrances.  
“SAKUCHAN!!” she yelled, practically jumping on the other girl, almost making her hit her head on the desk, “What happened to you?! You look like a zombie! What did you do last night!? Why didn’t you call me!? I could’ve helped you with whatever… Uh… Zombie apocalypse you went through! You know I’m a pro at this kind of things!”  
Sakura let out a lament, shaking the other girl off of her.   
“No, you’re not, you always start yelling after the first minute in every zombie-movie!”   
“Yeah, but after seeing you today like this and not screaming of fear, I think I’m healed. _Now_ I can watch horror movies like a pro!”  
“You’re not funny, _Shige_!”

She didn’t know why, but the whole scene going on before her eyes made Haruka look away and feeling very annoyed. She started tapping her foot on the floor while waiting for Sakura to stop messing around and actually _behave_ like an adult!  
“ _So_ , Sakura?” _and_ she called her by her fist name, again. “Sorry, I meant—“  
“Oh, why don’t you give her a break, huh?” Murashige cut her off, “You can see she’s exhausted, she probably stayed up until late at night doing something important, so why don’t you leave her alone?”   
Haruka opened her mouth to reply, but quickly closed it back when Anai Chihiro, her one and only ally in the whole school, spoke up for her.   
“It appears logical to me that someone like _you_ , Murashige, thinks it is normal if one of our classmates sleeps on her desk during classes, given your own usual performance in here,” – Murashige rolled her eyes so hard that she thought they could fall down from the back of her head if she tried more – “But, it isn’t normal for the rest of us who always try to show appropriate behavior and conduct in front of the teachers. What Kodama-san was suggesting is that Miyawaki-san goes resting in a more appropriate place than this classroom. I’m sure the infirmary’s bed will feel much more comfortable to her than this old desk,”  
“It’s fine, I feel much more rested now,” Sakura said, making sure that both the Class President and her loyal _pet_ got it that she did, indeed, effectively sleep for the past two hours, “Besides, President, didn’t you prepare a very long, _very_ difficult presentation about Tokugawa Period for history class? I heard you’re going to speak for one, entire, hour. I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” she said, looking straight into Haruka’s eyes.   
Murashige burst out laughing, “She’s _so_ going to lisp,”   
Haruka felt the immediate urge to run. She felt the urge to yell at that illiterate _monkey_ to shut the hell up, and then run away. She hated it. She hated it _so much_ when people who weren’t even a tenth as intelligent and cultivated as she was dared to laugh at her, dared to make fun of her. Each and every single one of them reminded her of her father – her illiterate, stupid, useless, obnoxious, awful, failed, attached-only-to-alcohol-and-gambling- _father_.   
“You…” she began, clenching her fists, “You’re n ** _iy_** othing but an ignorant, damaging for our soci ** _y_** ety, obnoxious paras ** _h_** ite. You’re one of those people who will achieve nothing in their lives because they’re too stupid ** _yn_** and pathetic to even be able to dre ** _iy_** am about the future, let alone to _aspire_ to create something, or to be ** _ky_** ome someone. You will live your miserable life miserably, like a nobody.  Then we’ll see who is going to laugh when you’ll be scraping the dirt out of some McDonald’s toilets while I will be running one of the most powerful and important business companies in Japan!”.  
(She kind of felt proud about the fact that she didn’t lisp that last part)  
And with that last line, she headed back to her seat (still all distressed and doing her best to swallow all her emotions) followed by Chihiro – or, as she called her, Chiichan. 

Their friendship started unexpectedly. Mostly because Haruka didn’t mean to befriend her – she didn’t mean to befriend anyone, really. But after she was elected as Class President, the other girl volunteered to give her a hand in case she was too busy or she was shouldering too much by herself, and, well, she actually was. Talk with all her classmates, listen to all their requests (of which most of them were _very_ silly ones. Like that time Kojina Yui asked for a big wall-mirror in their class because she needed to constantly check her looks in it, and how she claimed it to be a matter of _life or death_ …), then present them to the rest of the Student Council - where she knew absolutely _no one_ and she always felt so nervous and about to throw up…  A hand, eventually, was more than welcomed. Besides, the girl revealed herself to be a very loyal friend. She didn’t mind Haruka’s lisp, she didn’t laugh at it, although most of the times Haruka had to repeat what she wanted to say several times before she could say it in a decent way for the girl to catch it. It was frustrating at times, but she also knew it wasn’t the girl’s fault – if anything, she had to be grateful because she was the only person who was still trying to stand by her side despite everything. 

Chihiro wasn’t the smartest girl in class, she had few learning problems - she couldn’t focus too much on one only subject, because after a while it was as though her brain stopped working and she only felt like sleeping. What was remarkable about her, though, was the fact that she never stopped trying, and few times she asked for Haruka’s help in order to learn a specific subject or to prepare for a test. She wasn’t the smartest girl, but she definitely wasn’t the stupidest either – that was _by far_ Murashige’s title.    
Therefore, all things considered, Haruka was glad to have Chihiro by her side. 

History class was (kind of as expected) a complete _disaster_.   
Haruka did present a very detailed, well edited, perfectly written research on the Tokugawa Period, but of course, when she had to enunciate it to the whole class, she lisped. Badly. Almost every word.   
Everyone kept laughing at her and she felt _so_ humiliated. Despite she had worked so hard, despite she had spent hours and hours exercising for it, repeating every single word aloud, a thousand times – a million times. But each time she felt distressed or nervous about something, her talking only got worse. She knew it, and she couldn’t do anything about it. She knew it, and she hated it. She hated it, and she hated every single one of her classmates who laughed at it. Every single one of them – except, well, for Chihiro who didn’t laugh (she kept staring at Haruka with her hands together as though she was actually praying for her. Haruka could actually feel her support, but it didn’t help much…) and… Sakura didn’t laugh either, but it didn’t matter because she already hated her for a bunch of other reasons! 

She spent the rest of  the classes with her head on the books, avoiding to meet anyone’s gaze and pretending not to hear some of her classmates who were _still_ mocking her and making fun of the way she spoke. Sometimes she’d look in Sakura’s direction on the other side of the class, mostly during breaks, mostly when she heard her laughing. She wondered if Murashige was mocking her as well and if Sakura was laughing at her _now_. But, in all honesty, she was looking at her because she had always been kind of attracted by her laugh. It was cute and peculiar, and sometimes she wondered if one of the many reasons behind her hate for Murashige didn’t also include the fact that she seemed to be the only one who could make Sakura laugh (but then she slapped herself mentally because, why on earth would she be asking herself such a thing? Why would she care about who made Miyawaki Sakura laugh? It’s not like she felt _jealous_ or something…!).

Classes ended past 3pm, only to leave time for club activities.  
Haruka was a member of the Writing Club and, of course, Sakura was a member too.   
Because she had never been able to properly convey her feelings or thoughts into spoken words, she found in writing the best and most fulfilling way to vent or just express her thoughts as a whole. She kept three different diaries: in one she usually reported her daily experiences both at and outside school; she’d mostly either vent about what went wrong during the day, or gratifyingly write about some personal achievements. In the second she wrote about general opinions she had about certain specific issues, such as social or political issues, but also touching much deeper subjects such as philosophical or psychological ones. In the third, she just wrote down few poems she’d come up with, totally randomly and instinctively, sometimes. She loved when it happened. She had always appreciated and felt very, very close to any kind of artistic expression. 

Sakura, on the other hand, mostly wrote stories. Novels, tragedies, screenplays (she _loved_ togo watchingtheater plays and she was a movie appreciator in the first place), or even something she came up with by herself; taking the lyrics of a song she really liked and write a story - coming up with real characters, backgrounds, specific scenarios and situations - by still staying true to the main “storyline” that the lyrics itself was telling. She found it to be very stimulating and especially fun. She was also praised by the Writing Club President herself for one of her lyrics-based-stories which she wrote.   
The thing, of course, didn’t make Haruka happy. 

The Writing Club was composed by other five members.  
Watanabe Mayu, 3rd year – she was the Club President. According to _everyone_ in the school, “Perfect” was her middle name. Perfect grades, perfect looks, perfect personality. She was the Pride of their school, together with Kashiwagi Yuki, who was her best friend probably in the entire world. Together they were considered to be the two aces of the school, the two faces that had made their school become worth be mentioned probably nationwide (they were even called “Queens” by few particularly devoted ones…). Needless to say, they were the two people Haruka looked up to the most in the entire school.   
Iriyama Anna, 2 nd year – she was the Club Vice-President. She had the highest grades in every subject except for P.E. Beautiful to say the least, she was kind and always willing to lend a hand for those who needed it. Socially awkward at times, just like Haruka she found in writing a way to properly convey her thoughts which in words didn’t come out just as well. She was bullied for almost the entire first year, until she stumbled upon the one person who never left her side since then.   
Kizaki Yuria, 2nd year – there was absolutely _nothing_ that linked that girl to the Writing Club, in terms of intellectual interest, if not the presence of Iriyama Anna (Annin or An-chan, for her) in it. Despite she herself wouldn’t have been able to say what 7 times 8 was, she managed to be promoted to second year thanks to her best friend’s help. She usually approached people in a very aggressive way, as though she was totally going to punch them in the face if they only tried to look at her in the wrong way. But as you actually managed to look beyond the surface – well _, if_ she let you look beyond the surface and didn’t kick you in the face, first – what you were going to find was a caring, kind hearted, yet resolute high school girl who just didn’t want to let anyone step on her.   
Tomonaga Mio, 1 st year – Mio-chan was in the same class as Haruka and Sakura. She was a very quiet girl; even if she wanted to yell at someone for whatever reason, her voice always came out small and tiny. To everyone’s surprise, though, she ended up becoming very good friends with Tashima Meru, another classmate of theirs, who instead was one of the loudest and most extrovert girls in there. She used to write manga-like-stories, which Meru would later have fun reading and occasionally illustrate - despite her drawings always resulted in actual _monsters_ and _horrible creatures,_ because drawing definitely wasn’t her thing. But Mio didn’t mind, she found Meru’s drawings funny, other than _very_ creepy.   
  
The last member was Chihiro, who joined the club only to stay close to Haruka, who absolutely had no clue about it. But things were going to change, soon. 

That day’s activity was decided to be writing a song. Actually, that wasn’t only going to be that day’s activity, but the Club President herself thought it could’ve been especially stimulating if the girls tried to come up with something really meaningful for them – by attempting to write something that seemed to be completely out of their comfort zone - throughout the remaining very few months left until the Christmas Festival the school held every year the day before Christmas Holidays started. Once they came up with something original that felt like them, that represented how they truly felt, they could’ve asked for some help to the Music Club for a little instrumental backing, and the girls could’ve performed their original songs in front of the whole school. Showing not only what amazing writers – and occasionally, _song_ -writers - they were, but also what potentially amazing performers they could be.   
The idea was still a very abstract one, though. She still had to present it to the Student Council, although she had the feeling it wasn’t going to be a problem. First, because she knew the President kind of had a _thing_ for cute girls performing… And second, because the Vice President _was_ actually her best friend. 

Despite Mayu was the person she respected the most in the whole school, Haruka wasn’t really thrilled about the idea. And it wasn’t because she didn’t want to challenge herself with something new like writing a song - she was always up for new challenges -, it was just that she didn’t think _singing_ could actually be her thing.  She didn’t want to give it her _everything_ , and perhaps be able to come up with something truly meaningful for her, only to be, then, laughed at by the _whole_ school due to her “speech impediment”. That really was going to be the worst thing _ever.  
_ But on top of that, the Club President had another _brilliant_ idea - pair them up. To make the whole thing more stimulating. And because throughout the few months they had spent together she learned which friendships were already “well established” and which still weren’t, she thought to pair them up accordingly.

“This is bullshit!” exclaimed Yuria.  
“Yuria-chan, please…”  
“No, don’t “Yuria-chan” me, alright?! Just because you’re the Club President it doesn’t mean I can’t disagree with your crap idea, you know,”  
“Yuria…” Anna spoke up, too.   
“No, I know you agree with me too, An-chan! They all do! I mean, have you even taken a look at those two?!” she said to Mayu, pointing at both Sakura and Haruka, “They _clearly_ can’t stand each other. And you’re pairing them up together? Are you stupid or what?”  
“Yuria!” Anna scolded her.  
Haruka coughed. Sakura just kept silent.   
“The point of this project is to make you girls challenge yourselves with something you’d never do, like writing a song. So-“  
“Exactly! Writing a song is already a pain in the ass, imagine how it must be doing it with someone we barely even know!” she interjected her, then turned to Mio, “No offence intended, Mio-chan,”   
Mio blushed, “A-ah, none taken…” she said, her voice almost inaudible as always.   
“I’m not doing this stupid thing unless you pair me up with Annin!”  
“Perfect then,” Mayu replied, opening the club room’s door, “If you don’t want to take part to the club activities, you may as well leave. Nobody needs you here,”   
Everyone just froze, including Yuria. Their eyes wide open.   
Haruka had heard talking about a certain anecdote that saw the young woman actually getting mad at another student, once. She didn’t yell, she didn’t do any kind of show off - she simply made them regret to even start arguing with her. By using nothing but words and her usual, well-known, typical stoic-face.   
“You didn’t join this club because you liked writing in the first place, did you? Indeed, as a matter of fact, you’ve yet got to write anything worth mentioning to the Student Council and worth printing and handing to the rest of the students so that it can be praised and recognized by everyone else too, have you? You wouldn’t even be a second year student now, if it weren’t for your precious friend, here. So, tell me, Yuria-chan, is there _anything_ that you can actually do? Or are you nothing but just one of those miserable losers? Because we don’t need one of them _here_ ,”.   
  
Anna turned to her friend, a very concerned look on her face. She was standing behind her, though, so she couldn’t see the tears that the other girl was trying her best to hold back. It was better that way, Yuria thought. It was better if she couldn’t see that side of her being exposed.    
The girl slowly approached Mayu, to the point their noses were basically touching. The older girl didn’t take even one step back, and her expression didn’t change one bit.   
Yuria clenched her teeth, her eyes fixed on Mayu’s. Not a tear was going to run down her cheeks. She wasn’t going to let the other girl have that satisfaction.   
“I am staying in this club because, if one of you _bitches_ ever dares to say one only, slightly bad thing toward Annin, one critique, _anything_ that might even slightly hurt her feeling, I am going to kick her ass _so_ badly, she won’t be able to sit down for two months,” she paused for a moment, her eyes vicious, “And you’re the first one on the list, _Queen_. ‘Cause I’m not afraid of you,”.   
The air became even heavier – if it was possible – and no one dared to move a muscle. Anna actually thought about grabbing her friend’s arm and dragging her out of there, but she knew it wasn’t going to be much of a use, now. She had already messed up, badly. Although, she had to admit it, those words had hit her deep in the chest… In a positive, kind of fluttering, way.   
“And Mio-chan and I are going to write one of the best songs that’s ever been written, alright?”, Yuria continued, releasing the tension between the two by taking few steps back, “It’s gonna be _so_ good you’re actually gonna wish there was an mp3 version of it so that you could listen to it every moment of your miserable, up to your ass, disgusting life,”.  
Mayu kept silent for a few seconds, then just smiled, “I’m looking forward to it, then”. 

The following two hours passed by without any further complications – sort of. When Mayu suggested that the pairs sat next to each other and started discussing what kind of song they wanted to write, what genre and such, and also informed them that the usual club activities were anyway going to resume the following day – so that they had to keep seeing each other at each other’s homes to discuss about the project – Haruka started feeling that same uncomfortable feeling she felt whenever it came to Sakura. However, because they both had to ultimate a writing project they had started a few days before there at the club, when Haruka asked Sakura – with considerable struggle - to come back at home with her after club activities, so that they could discuss about the song-writing together that same day, Sakura said she couldn’t because she had something important to do with her family, and that she was going to let her know when she was going to be free.   
  
Rejection was hard to swallow for Haruka, as well as lies.   
Once club activities came to an end, and Haruka boarded the bus which was going to take her home, she saw Sakura walking in the direction opposite to her home, and also wearing casual clothes (they were supposed to keep the school uniform on until they reached home). So she didn’t think about it twice - she got off the bus and started following _her_.


	2. "I love you"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry about this, guys lol...

Despite Sakura’s shift was supposed to start at 10pm, she had to head to the hostess club much earlier because, apparently, they had to start rehearsing for a live music performance which was going to be held in a week, on Jurina’s suggestion. The first couple of days there, Sakura had learned that their hostess club wasn’t the most popular in town. There were much bigger places, which could host a much larger number of customers, as well as a larger set of hostesses, where people were naturally more drawn to. So Jurina had come up with that idea in an attempt to raise the popularity of their hostess club. And it wasn’t a bad idea, Sakura had to admit, it surely was original, but between the Club President’s first-writing-and-then-performing-original-songs-idea and this one, Sakura was starting to think that life was giving her a sign. 

Their bar was composed by eleven hostesses, including Sakura and Jurina, who most of the time worked as Saionji’s right hand (Although she had learned that there was a twelfth girl who used to work with them until a few months before Sakura’s arrival, who found her soul-mate in one of their customers and decided to abandon the hostess life to get married. Her name was Maeda Atsuko, but the other girls would never address the mysterious customer by full name – probably because _they_ were somebody influent or some kind of a celebrity  –, so Sakura only knew that person’s initials, which appeared to be T.M.);  
  
Kojima Haruna – Alias: Konbu – was the one who always drew the greatest number of regular customers. Perhaps, it was because of her big, fleshy lips, or because of her light-headed-like personality, or because of her occasionally sadistic character, but the first time she met her, Sakura already knew she had to be the most popular girl among them.   
Shinoda Mariko – Alias: Kumanomi – was the oldest among them, but also the kindest. Despite Sakura was new, and she had joined only a couple of days before, the woman already showed herself to be very caring and loving toward her, doing her best to make her feel at home. She behaved like an older sister toward the rest of the girls too, despite Sakura had already caught her pranking them a couple of times at the end of their shifts. She wondered if she hadn’t got any pranks yet only because she was new, and also how long that “special treatment” toward her was going to last.   
Matsui Rena – Alias: Tako. Yes, she had Jurina’s same family name, but, apparently, they weren’t related. The woman was clearly a loner, she barely even spoke with the other girls, and it looked like there were some issues going on between her and Jurina. That’s what Mariko had told her, at least. Something about, “Never mention Rena when you’re in Jurina’s presence unless it’s _strictly_ necessary”.   
Okada Nana – Alias: Karei. Nana was one of the loveliest girls Sakura had ever had the pleasure to meet in a lifetime. She was so kind and friendly and funny, but also so serious and scrupulous about her job, that Sakura kind of felt inspired by her. Even though it looked like she always and only ever had female customers, for some reason…   
Yokoyama Yui and Shimazaki Haruka – respectively: Maguro and Plancton. There wasn’t much to say about them, if not that it looked like they joined the hostess world together. They were childhood friends and never left each other’s side, apparently. They were both pretty popular among customers, but Paru-chan (that was the nickname everyone used to call her) was usually more requested than Yui, despite her very well-known salty character among them.   
Itano Tomomi and Ota Aika – respectively: Anago and Unagi. They both were very kind, very caring girls, when you met them in the dressing room. They, too, helped Sakura to quickly feel accepted and comfortable in the new work-environment. But as soon as they were requested by customers, they immediately started to act all snobbish, uncaring and rude in front of them. But customers had to like that, since they regularly came back and requested for the two of them always together.   
Last, but not the least, is Sashihara Rino – Alias: Hamachi. Just like Mariko, she was like the bigger sister in there, but unlike her, she didn’t want to make Sakura feel too comfortable or relaxed around the others. She wanted for her to remember that, yes, the hostess world could be seen as a little family - they all kind of looked after one another -, but at the end of the day, just like it might happen between siblings, there was a certain rivalry among them. They were rivals. The one who got the greatest number of requests carried the name of the club. Without her, the club didn’t exist. Therefore, to be “the most popular girl” among customers was kind of a big title. And Sashihara wanted for her to remember that they all aimed to that place – which currently was Kojima’s (and which before, apparently, was Maeda’s).    
She was actually thankful to Sashihara, too. She needed someone who reminded her to be the best at work, too. She needed someone who reminded her what she had to do to be able to take at home the greatest amount of money, too. Because that was why she found herself in that place in the first place. 

As she arrived at work, she was greeted by Jurina, who quickly escorted her to a different room, adjacent to the main, where there was a small stage waiting for her. The rest of her co-workers were already standing on it, and as she joined them, Jurina started assigning them their positions.   
Surprisingly enough, Sakura was going to stand right next to Kojima and Jurina herself, on the front.   
As Jurina went on explaining what kind of song they were going to perform, occasionally showing little pieces of choreography - which, by the way, she came up with all by herself -, and also showing them the kind of dresses they were going to wear (fringe, golden ones), Sakura felt the need to address the elephant in the room.   
  
“I’m sorry, can I say something?” she hesitantly spoke up.  
Jurina simply nodded.  
“Don’t get me wrong, I’m absolutely happy to know that I’ll be standing on the front during this, uh, stage performance – I guess – but, are you sure this is a good idea? I mean, I’m totally up for the job - I am going to work hard in order to learn the choreography and everything, but… Are you sure we’re going to draw more people to this place if you put _me_ on the front instead of… someone else?”  
Jurina smiled, mischievously, “Are you suggesting that you don’t feel confident enough about your looks?” she asked, slowly approaching the other girl on stage.   
“What? _No_ , I mean… I am confident about my looks, but given the reason why we’re doing all of this in the first place, I just thought that maybe, if you put a prettier girl in my… place…” she felt her voice gradually dying as Jurina got closer and closer, to the point she wrapped her arm around Sakura’s waist and their faces were only few inches away from one another.   
Sakura’s eyes and mouth were wide open in surprise.   
“I’m pretty sure that every single customer that’s going to come, as well as any new person that’s going to feel drawn to this place also thanks to _you_ , will think exactly the same thing I end up thinking every time I lay eyes on you - what a lovely, _beautiful_ girl we have here”.   
Sakura shyly smiled, but when she tried to move away from Jurina’s grasp, the other girl only held her tighter.   
“Jurina, why don’t you give it a break already, huh?” Rena spoke up.  
While Sakura mentally thanked her a hundred times, Jurina’s smile suddenly disappeared.   
“Why, what do you care?” she retorted, turning toward Rena but without releasing her hold on Sakura just yet.   
“I _care_ , because I came here three hours earlier to do rehearsals, not to see you adding another trophy to your personal collection,”  
“My personal collection!?” she exclaimed, now letting go of Sakura only to approach Rena, “It’s funny to hear that from someone who only knows how to play with people’s feelings!”  
(In the meanwhile, Mariko had approached Sakura and pulled her closer in an attempt to protect her from Jurina’s smooth hands. She asked her if she was OK, and then muttered something like: “Here we go again…”. That made Sakura realized why everyone looked so accustomed to Jurina’s sudden move toward her and to what was just happening in that moment.)  
“It’s not my fault if some people are too childish and immature to understand when someone doesn’t return their feelings!” Rena shouted back.  
“Here it comes again, that stupid excuse! The problem isn’t me being childish, it’s you not being honest enough about your intensions and feelings toward me!”  
“Alright, this round is over,” Saionji suddenly spoke up, appearing from outside the stage-room, “Is it really that hard for you ladies not to discuss about your _things_ in front of other people, tell me?”  
  
Dark and mysterious as usual, the man began walking his way through the room. Sakura wondered if he had been outside for the whole time, listening to them talking, making sure that Jurina did her job properly, or if the two women started arguing so loudly that he could hear them from his office – which was very unlikely, though. She had been to his office the day she decided to join the club. It was dark and small, there were no windows and it smelled of tobacco and alcohol. And it definitely was soundproofed – it had to be, or the constant music and talking during the girls’ shifts would have made it impossible for him to focus on his work.   
He started scolding the two women for lacking of professionalism and for staring to argue in front of everyone else. Using words such as, “And this isn’t the first time I’m telling you” or “Like I said the last time, and the previous one, and the one even before” which made it clear that wasn’t the first time they were being scolded, either – he even mentioned Sakura and the fact that they shouldn’t have done it especially in front of her, because she was new and they could be of a bad influence on her.   
The truth is that Sakura clearly got it that there was something - on a love relationship level - going on between the two and, yes, it kind of surprised her – especially Jurina’s forwardness in grabbing her and probably thinking about kissing her. She didn’t know if she tried to do that only to make Rena feel jealous, or if she did that with any newbie only to have some fun,  or if there was whatever other reason behind that gesture. What she knew is that she didn’t want to be dragged into any kind of lesbian drama. She already had enough problems at home, _and_ people hating on her at school. 

Haruka knew that following Sakura blindly, through the streets of a suburban Fukuoka, for nearly an hour, wasn’t a wise idea. But she also knew that, as Class President, it was her duty to be sure that her classmates didn’t get involved in anything dirty ( _and_ she also felt pretty annoyed because Sakura had lied to her, so she wanted to know why she did that as well). Thus, she followed her until the entrance of an “Aquarium”, which clearly was everything but that. They had passed at least three different hostess clubs, which weren’t trying just as hard to hide their true nature, before reaching for that place. And what kind of “Aquarium” opens to the public only past 10pm? Who would ever go visiting it, anyway?   
  
But despite it was clear that Sakura’s work wasn’t going to include feeding any fish, she wanted to see it with her own eyes. She wanted to catch Sakura red-handed, and she wanted to make her realize that she couldn’t fool her with lies.

But she also couldn’t stay out there, waiting for the clock to hit 10pm, in the cold, doing nothing. She knew she couldn’t enter the club with her school uniform – she was pretty sure that high schoolers weren’t allowed there - so she looked around, taking notes of street names – which she knew she was very likely going to forget – and then called a taxi which took her home (yes, her mother always left her extra money in case she needed anything. Like calling a taxi, buying a new phone, buying a mansion…).   
Once at home, she did her homework, she ate dinner, and then she got ready to go out. She decided to wear a long sleeved black one-piece, and to wear a make-up that would have made her look a little older. She told her mother that she was going out with some friends (and she was surprised when her mother actually _believed_ that), she took the false ID her father got made for her when she had to go buying him alcohol to a store where he got kicked out one night when he was completely drunk, and headed outside. 

The lights, the smells, the sounds, the people – everything was very new to Haruka. She had never had the chance to pay attention to a nighttime Fukuoka, mostly because she never went out at this late at night in the first place. Despite Chihiro had invited her out a couple of times, she had always refused because homework and speech-exercise were her priority. But now that she was looking at it, at her own town being adorned by colors she had never seen before, while the taxi passed by streets and shops, and people going back home after a day of work, she was intrigued by it. She was intrigued by what kind of stories her own town had to tell at night. And one among many, was Miyawaki Sakura’s story. 

About one and a half hour later, she was back at the “Aquarium”. Now she could hear some music and voices coming from the inside. She took a deep breath and decided to step in.  
She found a black-haired young woman to welcome her. She was wearing a dark-blue dress adorned with silver embroidery, and a very charming smile on her face. She looked… Pretty, Haruka thought.   
“Welcome to the Aquarium, miss. My name is Kurage,” she said, handing Haruka a card with her name on it, “May I check your ID, please? It’s just a formality, of course, but we seldom receive such lovely and cute customers who look as young as you do,”.  
Haruka lifted an eye brow, slightly blushing at the young woman’s words. Was she flirting with her? That was the first time anyone had ever made some kind of a compliment to her, anyways, and it made her feel… Good. Kind of. But she did notice the alias the girl used – Kurage. Now that explained why of the Aquarium themed sign at the entrance. Sakura wasn’t going to feed any fish – she _was_ the fish. And customers were the fishermen.   
She handed her ID to Jurina, and waited in silence as she quickly checked it. She had never felt comfortable about lying. And she knew she wasn’t good at it, either. So just like the first time she had to present her false ID at the liquor store, she stood still, without saying a word.   
When the other woman handed it back to her, she released a breath she knew she had been holding.   
  
“I can tell this is your first time in a hostess bar, miss. Kodama,” – Jurina said, laying a hand on Haruka’s shoulder – “But you don’t have to be nervous. You’re going to spend a magical night, I promise,”.   
And with that said, she escorted her to the main room, where middle-aged-men and potentially all young women seemed to be spending a fun time together.   
The place smelled like vanilla, many different kinds of perfume and tobacco all mixed together. Despite the sign at the entrance, this time there was no hint of blue on the walls that could remind you of an actual Aquarium – only black and red in the background with sparkling silver and white as decorations.   
“So,” – the woman to her side said in a whisper – “Do you see anything you like?”  
Now, _that_ question made Haruka’s heart skip a beat. Because after the colors, and the smells – and also the music, actually, which was quite relaxing – the only thing that caught her attention was her. Sakura. Who was wearing a plain white dress, with sparkling silver stones on the upper part of it, with a long necklace, probably also made of silver stones, that forced your eyes to dwell on her exposed chest as you took a look at it. All to match with a lovely, flower-shaped, white hair-clip and a pair of white earrings, which only made her beautiful, pale skin stand out even more. 

Jurina looked at her, quite amused by the scene. Her predictions about Sakura resulted to be right, after all. She definitely was going to stand on front line with her and Kojima for that stage performance.   
“Very well then,” – she spoke up, forcing the younger girl to jump out from her staring-trance – “Would you like to meet her in a more private room? Only the two of you?”  
“ _What_?! N-no, I mean…  I don’t—“   
“It’s fine, miss. No need to feel embarrassed about it,”   
“I’m not embarr ** _iy_** ass ** _h_** ed! I’m just… “  
What? She was just _what_?   
  
She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down, slightly shaking her head in the attempt to collect her thoughts back together. She wasn’t there to have fun, after all. She wasn’t there as a _customer_.   
“Well, _actually_ ,” - she began, clearing her throat and regaining her composure – “Yes, I’d like to go to a private room with _her_ ,” she said, nodding in Sakura’s direction – who was intended to animatedly talk with some bald, fat, looking-disgusting-man.   
The brunette gave a nod of understanding and then escorted her in another room, behind some black curtains and a red door.   
She originally wasn’t planning to spend too much time there, really. Just what was enough to make things clear between her and Sakura and then leave. But she didn’t consider that Hostess Clubs had pre-fixed orders which you had to subdue for. So when Jurina asked her how long she intended to stay, Haruka had to sign up for one hour – which was the minimum available. She didn’t have a choice, did she? She had gone all that way to catch Sakura red-handed, she couldn’t back up now.   
After the time was set, Jurina asked her to take a sit in the room and to patiently wait for the requested girl, who was going to join her soon. 

The room was warm and welcoming, with a big L-shaped couch which looked _very_ comfortable. The walls, now, were mostly painted of a light-red, with the word “LOVE” written in black all over them. The background song was different from the one in the previous room, too. It was more sensual, more adult-oriented, and everything made Haruka start feeling _very_ uncomfortable. 

To keep the conversations going was one of the most difficult tasks about her job, Sakura would dare to say. Talking wasn’t really her best skill, especially when the other person kept coming up with very boring and not-interesting-at-all-topics about his employees or his golf matches. Or when he started talking about his children and his wife while spending time at a Hostess Club and while staring at another, way younger, woman’s chest.   
That was another thing she couldn’t stand about that job. How those men kept wasting time with strangers instead of going back to their own families. She often times thought about her father and if there might have been the remote possibility that he once spent one of his nights like that… But she quickly shook the thought out of her head because she knew how much her father loved her and her mother. She knew there was no way that such a thing could ever happen. 

Thus, when her time with president Nakabayashi finally came to an end, and Jurina instructed her to go to one of the private rooms where a girl was waiting for her, she felt both very surprised and relieved – if it were a man, he would’ve probably spent the whole time touching her, and because it wasn’t against the rules, she would’ve had to subdue to it. She remembered what happened the last time she tried to slap one of her customers on the face, and considering what had happened only few hours earlier, she wondered if Jurina wasn’t going to punish her in a different way this time if she tried anything… 

But when she stepped into the room and closed the door behind her back, she struggled to believe to her own eyes.   
“What in the name of God are you doing here?!” she exclaimed, keeping her voice down.   
“I—I could ask you the same question!” - Haruka replied, as she clumsily stood up from the couch and nervously adjusted her dress – “Y-You said you had s ** _h_** omething important to do with your family and that was why you couldn’t come to my house to discuss about the song-writing-project for the school club, so…”  
Sakura furrowed in disbelief. What the _hell_?  
“Did you… Follow me?”  
“Yes, I did,” Haruka simply replied. There was no point in lying, after all.   
Sakura raised an eyebrow. She began taking a few steps closer to the other girl.   
“And may I ask you _why_ did you follow me?”  
“ _Because_ , as Class President, it is my duty to make sure that my classmates don’t get their hands in anything dirty or illegal. And your presence here, Miyawaki-san, _is_ illegal,”  
“Your presence here is illegal as well, Kodama- _san_. Where did you get your false ID in the first place? Because you’ve got one, don’t you? Actually, it’s pretty surprising that you do, I didn’t think you could be this… Wild, you know. Going out at this late at night, coming in a Hostess Club with a false ID, what would the school principal think about our Class President if she ever came to know about it?”   
(Their bodies were inches away, now.)   
“A—Are you thr ** _iy_** eatening me?”  
“Are _you_?”  
Haruka’s throat felt suddenly very dry, and her breath felt like dying in her lungs. Her cheeks felt hot, her stomach felt weird. Her heart was probably about to explode because it was beating at a speed she didn’t think possible. This was different from any kind of weird feeling Sakura’s proximity had ever caused her, before. This was something else entirely. Because, as much as she had just realized that Sakura’s eyes were the most mesmerizing she had ever seen in her whole life, and as much as she would’ve liked to dwell in those eyes forever, she at the same time felt the need to look down. To stare at her whole body. To touch it, to kiss it. To feel it. She wanted to feel Sakura’s body against hers - that’s the thought that crossed her mind, straight like an arrow. And that was what made her act before even think.   
  
She simply leaned forward and kissed her.   
  
Sakura didn’t move. Sakura didn’t react at all. She simply stood there, with her eyes open wide, her mind blank, while she felt something inside her chest blossom like a flower. She then felt being pushed away the following moment, and her confused look was met by scared and shocked eyes. She opened her mouth to say something, to ask for the reason behind that once again unexpected action, but just like a scared animal the other girl fled the moment she realized what was coming - throwing the red door open and rushing outside the club.   
Sakura only followed her with her gaze – she knew she should’ve ran after her, she knew  she should’ve stopped her. If not to get some explanations, at least because she technically still was a customer and the look Jurina was throwing at her from outside the room was intimidating to say the least… But she didn’t do it. She didn’t want to do it.   
Call it self-preservation instinct, but the only thing she felt like focusing on at the moment was her job. Sure enough, letting a customer run away mustn’t have looked good to Jurina and Saionji’s eyes, but she was pretty sure that they weren’t going to kick her out from work just yet. Male customers looked pretty satisfied with her despite it was only her third day of work, and in a week they were going to hold that stage performance which Jurina seemed so eager to let her perform. She still had a chance to redeem herself and to prove to them how good she could be at that job, and letting Haruka run away, in a way, just made her feel more comfortable about it. Because perhaps she wasn’t going to say a word to the school principal, right? Perhaps, she wasn’t going to bother her ever again at school. Perhaps, she was only going to mind her own business from now on and leave her _alone_.   
Thus, as much as she still felt quite confused about what had just happened (and despite a part of her brain still demanded _explanations_!), she took a deep breath, put on her best smile, and slowly headed back to the main room.

 

For the following three days, Haruka didn’t show up to school. When she came back the fourth day, she had a couple of bruises on her right cheek and a little cut on her lower lip.   
Somebody had hit her. Somebody had hurt her.   
Among their classmates, there were people who never missed to laugh whenever Haruka lisped, or who very likely talked bad behind her back. Sakura knew it, and that was why it left her positively speechless when she saw how every single one of them readily rushed in Haruka’s direction as soon as she stepped into their classroom that morning. Asking her what had happened to her, who did that to her, how she was feeling, if she needed anything at all… Even Murashige was among them, and that was what made Sakura warmly smile. Her best friend, who often times would talk to her for hours about how much she hates the Class President, how much she can’t stand her and how much obnoxious and awfully snobbish she finds her, was now showing sincere concern toward her and offering to help her.   
People surely were weird beings, and Sakura was well aware to be one of them. 

Kodama Haruka had always hated her, for some reason, and she was well aware of that. That was why, Sakura had always tried to ignore her in the first place. She always tried to never pay too much attention to her, or to never give too much importance to what she said – or she might have said – behind her back. She honestly also found her very immature, at times, and she really couldn’t stand immature people either. But despite that, despite she had always tried not to feel too much invested in her, in any way, the moment she laid eyes on her that morning, she felt her heart in pain. As though a knife had just stabbed it, violently. As though it had been just torn apart by a beast which name she wasn’t sure to know. She wanted to know what had happened to her so badly. She wanted to speak to her so badly.   
And she tried to.   
When most of the crowd that had formed around her desk vanished, Sakura slowly approached Haruka from the other end of the classroom. She asked her how she was feeling, but the other girl didn’t even turn around to look at her (she was busy talking with Chihiro, who looked at Sakura with resentful eyes, for some reason). And when she tried to get her attention by laying a hand on her shoulder, the other girl quickly shook it off from her, rudely lisping at her not to touch her and to leave her alone. 

Sakura scoffed. Now, _that_ felt like a joke.   
She didn’t say a word and silently went back to her seat. But she wasn’t going to let her get away with it like that. 

She waited the end of lessons, patiently. Haruka was always the last to leave the classroom before heading to club-activities, and she thought she could take advantage of that situation for a change.   
Right when she was about to step out from the door, Sakura pushed her back inside and quickly closed the door behind her back.   
“So now _I_ am the one who needs to leave you alone, huh? Said the stalker who followed me to my work place,” she began, sounding a little angrier than planned.   
Haruka didn’t answer. She just kept her eyes low, fixed on the floor.   
“Who did that to you?”   
“That’s none of your bus ** _h_** iness,” Haruka replied, trying to push the other girl to the side and to open the door behind her back, but without success.   
“Oh, yeah? Just like knowing what kind of job I am doing _is_ none of your business too?” Sakura retorted, pushing her back once again.   
“Let me out!”   
“I’ll let you out when you’ll let me know who did that to you, Class President,”  
“Why?! What do you care in the first place?!” – she was yelling at her now – “You wanna know why I’ve been hating you s ** _h_** o much since first grade? Because you’ve got everything I want and you don’t even need to fight for it! You get your perfect grades without even struggling to get them, and I get to exercise my goddamn spe ** _iy_** aking skills from two to five hours per day only to be humiliated and laughed at by the whole class whenever there’s an oral e ** _in_** xam or the like! You get to be pr ** _iy_** aised by one of the two élite students of this school herself for one simple lyrics ** _d_** -based-s ** _d_** tory or whatever the hell you call that, and I don’t even get one goddamn “nice work, Kodama!” for one of my long, hard-thought works! You get to have your lovely, perfect family that loves you uncondi ** _siy_** tionally and has been super-present for you in your whole life, I get my horrible father that comes back home drunk every night, and then four nights ago even decides to start beating the hell out of my mother and me without a reason, without even realizing it and without even apologizing the following day!”  
“What!? _”_ Sakura tried to reach out for Haruka’s hand, but the girl readily pulled it back.   
“And I hate you be ** _ky_** ause I can’t seem to _truly_ hate you all the way down, otherwise I’d have already gone to the school principal and I’d have already told her what kind of job you’ve been doing, but inst ** _iy_** ead I can’t seem to stop thinking about you and your goddamn white dress and how beautiful and m ** _iy_** esmerizing you looked in it and how much I’d like to kiss you again right now!!” she stated, readily slapping herself on the mouth in shock as soon as she realized what she had just let slip out.   
“I--I didn’t mean that,”  
“Koda… No. Haruka,” Sakura began, slowly approaching the other girl, who kept withdrawing.   
Haruka couldn’t seem to find any more words to speak. Anything else to say.   
Her heart had just literally exploded in her chest, and she felt as though she could feel the warmth of its hot blood slowly trickling down inside her chest. She had just admitted, to both Sakura and herself, something she had been keeping inside for so long… _Now_ she realized it. Now she saw why. Why she hated her so much, but at the same time, why she had never been able to stop thinking about her. Since first grade.   
She felt a desk blocking her way, behind her.   
She felt tears she didn’t see gathering, running down her cheeks.   
She wanted to run. She needed to run.   
And so she did.   
But Sakura grasped her arm and resolutely turned her around, grabbing her in an embrace. She was crying too. She felt her heart heavy like a boulder. She felt guilty. She felt happy. She felt silly. She felt so many emotions all at the same time, she thought that was the first time she truly felt alive. She didn’t know what that was, or maybe she did, but she didn’t want to think about it. That wasn’t the time to think, that was only the time to feel. And so she did. She felt.   
She felt, and she told Haruka - gently, whispering – “I love you”. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sakura's "I love you" is in the widest meaning existing right here. It's not necessarely the I'm-in-love-with-you's "I love you".


End file.
